Zofees

In Sweden, we have someone called Anna Wahlgren who is an author of books on childcare and she is heavily debated. You can compare her to Gina Ford, the British childcare nurse, who has a similar approach on how to get babies/children to sleep. I stumbled upon her last night and I read about her ideas and methods on her website. I don't agree on everything she suggests, but I do agree on the fact that children of all ages need routines and going to bed (their own, not their parents bed, the sofa or the pram) at the same time every day. I know of course this isn't always possible (especially if you have a kolik baby..) and you need to adapt to what exactly your baby needs. Being straightforward and easy to read does the trick in my opinion. Since I've started to put the girls asleep at 6 and staying with them for an hour, they sleep much better and I finally have time to eat a whole meal without one arm around a baby or getting up caring for babies instead. It makes my life so much easier to have them on a routine and after a whole day (and night) at their service, I find having 3-4 hours in the evening at my disposal, quite nice. Of course I listen and react to every cry from the bedroom. I don't let them cry without helping them. And my babies have a tendency to cry when they want something (food) or need something (change diapers). If they wake up and are satisfied, they don't cry. They look around and daydream or take in their surroundings. So for me there is no question if I should let them cry for 5 minutes - I don't, because I know my babies and I understand the different sounds they make - if they are bored, if they are scared, if they are in pain, hungry etc. As a parent you KNOW and you should trust your instincts.

I called some authorities today regarding both Clara and myself. I got such great information and help. I was taken seriously and that means a lot! I felt as if a weight really was lifted from my shoulders. I feel as if I am doing something useful. Something meaningful and above all, starting the process to get answers, to get Clara's case into the stats and making her life meaningful too. If I can save another baby it would make me very happy. And even if I can't, if I don't get answers (because maybe there aren't any) and nothing changes; I have at least tried and authorities have looked into the matter.

The girls are starting to hold hands! And to look at each other. Finally!